A Glimpse Into My Head

So I wanted to make a playlist for… well, essentially heated making out. Because I’m getting plenty of that right now. Even when I do I don’t get to choose the music like how is that fair but whatever My problem is that I don’t want to put like… “Make Out Playlist” onto my iTunes library. In case my mom ever sees.

I know that sounds bizarre, why would my mom go on my computer? I couldn’t tell you, BUT MY DAD ASKED TO USE MY LAPTOP THE OTHER DAY AND I LET HIM AND I WAS TERRIFIED THE WHOLE TIME OKAY. I WAS CONVINCED HE WOULD SOMEHOW FIND PORN.

I DON’T EVEN HAVE PORN ON MY LAPTOP. 

Regardless, I was thinking, what could I put as my playlist name? I started thinking about what the playlist was about, and then I remembered Brendon Urie’s speech from the Nothing Rhymes With Circus tour, and how he segues into “Lying is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off” by describing it [or “not that dream”] as

               "Hard, sweaty, monstrous, fucking… shit."

So I was like, “Welp… that’s accurate if anything.” So I was like, “Could I just title it Brendon Urie’s speech?” 

Then… “Brendon Urie’s Speech.”

"….B.U.S."

"BUS."

And that’s the story of how at 11:30 at night at a sleepover I burst out laughing over the word “bus.”

Still don’t know what I’m gonna do with the playlist name either.

This is Gospel

I don’t want to be the kind of girl who waits for him anyone.

But I also don’t want to let him go.

I never belonged to him anyone, but the feeling of possession stays.